Sigh of relief

It's been a looong two weeks or so since I last posted. I'm sorry for my absence, but it was necessary. For one week, I was away, first at a conference, and then at my Ph.D. graduation. For the other week, I was trying to stay away from the internet, and just needed to think only positive thoughts and not obsess over what was going on inside me.

You see, at that follow-up appointment two weeks ago, they saw a thick band of tissue (called a synechia) across the amniotic sac. And they couldn't tell if the baby was attached to it or not. And they couldn't tell if the baby was going to have enough room to grow or not. The radiologist herself even came in for the scan and left saying she wanted to see me again in two weeks, and that there was reason to hope. Which also meant that there was possibly reason to despair. If the baby was attached to the synechia, it would mean very very bad things.

So for the last two weeks, I've basically tried to sit on my hands, breathe deeply, not think about it as much as possible, etc. So I had to escape from blogland for that to be possible. I'm really sorry for leaving you all in the dark. Thank you so much all of you who were checking in on me. I really appreciate it.

Today was our follow-up ultrasound. I'm about 10.5 weeks. AND! The synechia was smaller and thinner, and the baby was not attached, and is growing appropriately, and even has arms and legs and was swimming around. And the radiologist didn't even need to come in and the tech said that she hoped not to see us again until 18 weeks. They think it's just going to continue to shrink and that it's going to be absolutely nothing to worry about. I can't even describe how relieved we are, how much tension we've been holding about this.

I finally feel like maybe I can relax a little and enjoy this more, and not worry that I'm going to jinx myself by thinking ahead to early January, when this baby will make his/her appearance. Only a couple more weeks until the end of the first trimester, when I can breathe another sigh of relief, but I really feel like everything is going to be okay now. And I am insanely grateful.

We still have to meet with the high-risk OB practice on Wednesday, but I'm hoping it's just going to be a cursory consult, and that we can finally get transferred to a normal OB practice. I am beyond ready to just be normal.

And now, off to find out what's been going on with all of YOU!
(I think my Bloglines has something like 150 new feeds, so it might take me a while to catch up!)