Well, I'm back at work, even though I did have to leave early yesterday afternoon to go home and lie on the couch eating cereal out of the box (sidenote: have you ever tried Peanut Butter Bumpers? We (ok, mostly ME) are obsessed with this cereal. Seriously. As in more than one box a week. It's an addiction at this point), snuggling with my cat, and watching reruns of Law&Order.
I just get so tired! And I'm still a little sore - it feels more like dull period cramps than anything, like my ovaries are acting all huffy since somebody touched them.
But I'm definitely on the mend. And am really excited about my RE appointment on Thursday. I'm hoping that she'll give us the all-clear to finally start doing something! I've been in limbo for months now, finishing all the testing, surgery, K's visits to the porn room, etc. I'm just ready to start ingesting hormones and giving ourselves a real shot at having egg and sperm make sexy time.
At the suggestion of my Reiki practitioner, I've been visualizing holding my newborn, staring at his/her little face, inhaling his/her baby scent, enjoying that incredible sensation of holding a sleeping baby. When she first suggested it, it seemed like such a scary thing to do, since it would force me to acknowledge the (terrifying) hope. But now that I've been doing the visualizing, it actually makes me feel so happy. I know for sure, one way or another, I WILL be a mother. It's like that children's book, I just need to keep on chanting "I think I can, I think I can, I think I can, I think I can..."
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7 comments:
YUM. peanut butter bumpers sound awesome!!
good luck thursday, it is great to be getting started!
thanks for your comment on my blog, i've got positive hopes for you too!
Ahhhh... things are on the mend. Good to hear.
Good luck on Thursday. You'll be a hormone junkie in no time.
Law & Order, Mr. Kite enjoys that. Have you tried watching Justice? I love it!
Hoping for the thumbs-up on Thursday! "I know you can. I know I can..." I should do some visualizing myself. :-)
Glad to hear you're feeling better...
What a beautiful image of your sleeping baby. Keep doing that, its good to dream. Your day will come.
We always have a grasshopper or two for you :-) I hope the appointment goes well tomorrow. That you get the all clear. And that you continue to mend. Lap. Ouch.
Talk about visualization--think about how you can freak out your future child with those photos of the dye spillage when they're acting up. I mean, that is sure to stop a 4-year-old in their tracks...
And on a more serious note, I think those visualizations sound beautiful and I hope they happen for you soon.
hey carrie, thanks for your comment on my blog. you would think i would just be happy, but it's been sort of hard to absorb seeing those two lines. all the congratulatory comments have really meant a lot and really helped me try to get in the moment and enjoy it. i hope to be doing the same for you soon!
Hi Carrie,
Thanks for your nice comment! Man, I was nervous to post those videos so I totally appreciate the kind words.
And I loved what your Reiki person suggested! I haven't written about this, but I visualized all the time during this cycle. I saw the meds going in and working, my body totally accepting them without any side effects. I visualized my first monitoring appointment and calling my husband with good news, and spent a lot of time going through the day of retrieval.
It might sound 'out there' to some people, but for me it's made all the difference.
I hope everything works out for you!!
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